Through the Swirling Snowflakes
by drewandian
Summary: written for the sparky santa fic exchanged on LiveJournal; Elizabeth and John on Earth at Christmas


**Through the Swirling Snowflakes**

Christmas Eve, On Earth, AU-future season (real Elizabeth)

Elizabeth sighed contentedly. She still wasn't sure how they'd done it, but somehow they'd managed to give everyone who wanted it, some time on Earth for the holidays. Which was how she found herself in Colorado, on Christmas Eve, with John. It had been the luck of the draw, but she couldn't have been happier with how it worked out.

Elizabeth had casually mentioned plans to see her mother for dinner during their trip to Earth; John had surprised her by casually mentioning that he'd like to go along. This was how she found herself standing on her mother's front step with John, nervously wringing her hands, waiting for her mother to answer the door.

Elizabeth felt John stiffen slightly when she introduced him as her colleague and tried to ignore it. She also tried to ignore the knowing look her mother gave her during said introduction. Dinner couldn't have been better, the conversation ebbing and flowing as they ate. The topics of conversation jumped around, finally landing on how John had met Elizabeth. There wasn't much they could tell her, but John did mention being a pilot in the Air Force. He bit back a grin as Katherine Weir regarded him with a raised eyebrow, tilting her head slightly; much like Elizabeth had done millions of times.

"Air Force? Really?" she commented, looking quickly from John to Elizabeth and back to John again. Elizabeth's gut feeling that, somehow, her mother just _knew_ about them grew stronger.

When they'd finished eating, John helped the women clear the table and laughed when Elizabeth kicked them both out of the kitchen, saying she'd clean up.

John walked into the living room, the Christmas tree in the corner catching his eye. Nestled on a branch about half way up, almost hidden among the store bought matching ornaments, was a sparkly blue snowflake made from Popsicle sticks. A much younger Elizabeth had written her name on it in that wiggly little-kid handwriting all small children have.

He thought for a minute about the strong, confident woman in the kitchen, surprised when he found it easier than he would have thought to picture the vulnerable little girl she'd once been.

"Elizabeth made that when she was five; it's the only handmade ornament she'll let me put out. She's taken the rest and hidden them away." Katherine smiled and handed John a mug of coffee. "She's still that little girl, so full of wonder and excitement over experiencing new things. She just hides it well." She sipped her coffee, regarding John seriously over the top of her mug. "She needs someone to protect her from herself, she always has."

"Yeah, well, "John cleared his throat, reading between the lines. 'Like mother, like daughter' he thought. "We all take care of each other. It's my job to protect her – from everything." he retorted. "Even from herself." He smiled, taking a sip of his coffee. They exchanged a long look and he relaxed when she smiled and nodded slightly.

They turned, both looking a little guilty, when they heard Elizabeth clear her throat from the doorway.

"Oh, Mom…" she said, almost whining and walking toward them. "You _still_ hang that silly snowflake?"

"It's not silly, it's sweet. And I love it! It lets me keep a little piece of you here with me while you're off, doing whatever it is that you do." Katherine answered, taking her hand and squeezing it. Elizabeth squeezed back, ignoring the tears that welled in her eyes. "You are taking care of yourself, aren't you?" Elizabeth shot her mother a look. "I only ask because you look so tired." Elizabeth sighed in exasperation.

"I'm fine, Mom. It's just been very busy at work." she said in a 'just drop it already' tone.

"Don't worry, Ma'am, she's being taken care of." John said, ignoring the glare Elizabeth gave him. Her glare lost all its effectiveness when she failed to stifle a wide yawn. John bit back a grin and raised an eyebrow at her.

"Well, all right, I _am_ a little tired. We should probably go." She turned to face John, catching his eye. "I was planning on taking Sedge with me, just til it's time to leave again. I hope you don't mind." she said softly. He nodded in silent agreement.

They made plans to get together again before they had to leave for Atlantis and said their goodbyes. Elizabeth hugged her mother tight, flushing a little when Katherine whispered "He seems like a good man; let him take care of you." She pulled back, meeting her mother's eye and smiling softly.

"I'm trying." she answered quietly.

**~*~*~*~*~**

The first snowflakes started to fall just as they pulled up in front of John's apartment. Elizabeth let Sedgewick out of the car and stood with her face tipped up toward the snow, watching it shimmer in the street light as it fell.

"Oh I've missed this!" she sighed softly. "Let's go for a walk." she suggested. John came around the car and took her hand.

"There's a little park not far from here. Sedge will like it too…" he smiled, leading her toward the park. They walked in silence, hand in hand, just savoring the freedom to do so. They stopped by a park bench bathed in a pool of light from the lamp above them, laughing as Sedgewick ran off happily chasing snowflakes.

John turned Elizabeth toward him and smiled at her.

"Thank you." he said, kissing the tip of her nose and taking both of her hands in his.

"For what?" she asked, squeezing his hands.

"For sharing dinner with your mom with me. For sharing this –"he gestured to the two of them and the snowy park – "with me." He licked his lips, not really comfortable being so open but feeling the need to tell Elizabeth how he felt. "It's been a while since I've looked forward to Christmas. So..." he shrugged, his voice cracking a little. "Thank you."

Elizabeth smiled warmly at him, leaning in to kiss him softly on the lips.

"And I'm sorry about the awkward introduction." she sighed. "I'm sure Mom had this pegged for what it really is the minute she opened the door, but I kind of like it just being you and me, at least for a little longer. I promise I'll fill her in before we head back to Atlantis." Elizabeth felt John squeeze her hands again.

"Hey…it's ok. It threw me a little at first, but I think I understand." John pulled her into a tender embrace and kissed her deeply. For a minute, the world melted away and Elizabeth was aware only of John's hands at her hips, his lips against hers. "I kind of like the idea of having you all for myself." John whispered against her lips. Elizabeth shivered involuntarily, very aware that it was not from the cold. She could feel him smirk and pushed him away a little, raising an eyebrow at him. He grinned back impishly and chuckled.

They stood quietly for a minute, just watching the snowflakes swirl in the light above them. Elizabeth laughed quietly at the sight of Sedgewick running and playing in the snow. She felt John fidget slightly and gave him a questioning look.

John fumbled around in his pocket and then turned to Elizabeth.

"I…ah…" his voice cracked and he cleared his throat. "I have something for you, for Christmas. I had it made on one of the planets we visited about a month ago." He held out a small box for Elizabeth to take. She tilted her head to one side and regarded him with a raised eyebrow. She reached out slowly and took the box from him, suddenly feeling very nervous. She and John and been together, secretly of course, for over a year and a half, but they were both masters at avoiding the 'where is this headed' conversation. Both content to take what they could get, not willing to risk what they'd managed to steal for anything more.

She opened the box with trembling fingers and gasped, her eyes filling with tears.

Nestled in the box was a perfect replica of Atlantis, set in silver and strung on a delicate silver chain.

The charm sparkled, reflecting the lamp light much like the snowflakes that were now swirling faster around them. She lifted the necklace from the box and turned the pendant over in her hands. The symbol for the Pegasus galaxy was engraved on the back.

Elizabeth felt a few tears slide down her cheek as she moved to put the necklace on.

"Here, let me." John whispered roughly, overwhelmed by Elizabeth's silent reaction. He took the necklace from her and moved behind her, dropping a soft kiss on her neck once the necklace was securely in place. She turned to face him and kissed him firmly.

"Thank you, John. It's beautiful!" she sighed, running her fingers over the pendant. Neither of them brought up what Elizabeth had thought was in the box; in her mind, though, Elizabeth knew they couldn't avoid 'that talk' for very much longer.

She shivered again, this time from the cold. John squeezed her tight and took her hand again. He called to Sedgewick and they headed back to John's apartment.

~*~*~*~*~

John started a roaring fire in the fireplace and laid out some blankets and pillows in front of it. Elizabeth was in his room, changing into a pair of flannel pants and a t-shirt. She stopped in the kitchen to make hot cocoa while John changed. She could hear him put some music on and walked into the living room to find him sprawled on the floor, leaning against some pillows. He smiled softly at her as he took a cup of cocoa. She smiled back, her eyes twinkling as she noticed Sedgewick sound asleep, snuggled up next to John.

"Sedge has got good taste!" she quipped, settling herself down next to John. He pulled her close to him, wrapping an arm around her waist. He set his mug down and reached up to run a finger over Elizabeth's necklace.

"You're not disappointed, are you?" he asked quietly, gazing into the fire, wondering if he had interpreted Elizabeth's hesitation earlier correctly.

"Disappointed? That it wasn't a ring, you mean?" Elizabeth put her hand over John's. She felt him nod a little. "Not at all. This is perfect….it's beautiful. Besides, we should probably talk before you start buying me a ring." She felt him stiffen slightly and sighed. Their evening had been perfect and the last thing she wanted to do was ruin it with tension. This was the most relaxed either of them had been since they arrived in Atlantis the first time, and they both needed it. But Elizabeth knew it was time for them to talk, to make some decisions, and that it _had_ to be now. They were running out of time, of that she was certain.

"Look, John, I know you hate the 'touchy-feely' talks, and I know that I've mastered the art of avoidance, but it's time. It's…it's important." Her voice shook and she snuggled in closer to John, resting her head on his shoulder. "Do you think anyone knows about us?" she asked suddenly. "I know there's gossip, and people have their suspicions, but do they actually know?"

"If they do, they're not talking. And it doesn't seem to bother them. Not that I mind – like I said, I like having you all to myself." He dropped a kiss on her head.

"Well, it might be time to confirm all the rumors…." she started. "I'm getting kind of tired of hiding…" her voice trailed.

"Why the sudden change of heart?" John asked. He had never really cared one way or the other if everyone knew. In fact, he would have happily announced to all of Atlantis that he and Elizabeth were together, that he'd 'gotten the girl', but he knew that she worried about her image as the leader of the Atlantis and how sleeping with her second in command might look to some people.

"Well…because we're kind of running out of time, and I think we should at least tell the senior staff before it's too late. You…we…may need their support, and soon." Elizabeth rambled, making John frown, a little worried. "John, before we came here, I went to see Carson…" she let her voice fade.

"Elizabeth? Wh….what's going on? What's wrong?" John's heart began to race and he started to shake a little. His mind started listing all the reasons she could possibly need to see Carson, each one grimmer than the last. She had said that they were running out of time.

Elizabeth knew that she was being a little bit cruel, stringing John along a little, but she just couldn't help it. She had been waiting for weeks for the perfect opportunity to tell him. Now, snuggled in front of a fire with him and Sedgewick, feeling warm and cozy and safe, she just couldn't wait anymore.

"John…you might want to start getting used to the idea of sharing me. And we're going to have to tell some people soon. It's going to be very hard for me to keep our relationship a secret when I start to show." She took a deep breath and waited for John to process what she had just said to him.

"Wh…when..you start to show? "John stammered. "You…you're …we're…we're having a baby?!" He cleared his throat as his voice squeaked a little.

Elizabeth nodded her head, giggling a little. "I hadn't been feeling all that great, so I went to see Carson. Oh, he knows about us by the way." She grinned when she heard John chuckle. "He was a little shocked when I suggested a pregnancy test…" she giggled at the memory of the look on Carson's face when she had told him about her relationship with John. "Anyway, I'm about seven weeks along, and everything looks good."

"So, I'm gonna be a dad?" John asked, sounding both bewildered and excited. He felt Elizabeth nod against his shoulder. "I guess it _is_ time to have that talk then." he chuckled. " 'Course I think it's pretty clear…" He shifted his weight, moving Elizabeth around, his hazel eyes meeting her bright green ones. He licked his lips nervously. "It was my intention to see this through from the beginning, Elizabeth. This was never a casual 'just because we can' thing for me. I'm crap at the whole talking about my feelings thing, so I don't. But, don't doubt, even for a minute, that I want to spend the rest of eternity, or whatever, with you. That's all I've ever wanted, from the very beginning." Tears welled in Elizabeth's eyes, one sliding slowly down her cheek. He reached up and brushed the tear away with his thumb. "I love you, Elizabeth." he said, his voice rough with emotion.

"I love you too." she whispered, a warmth spreading through her at the realization of just how much she did love him.

John cupped her cheek with his palm and tilted her face up to his. He kissed her deeply, smiling against her lips when Elizabeth melted against him. They broke apart, needing air, and John rested his forehead against Elizabeth's. She sighed contentedly.

"What's so funny?" she asked as John started to chuckle. She turned around to settle against him again, his arms snaking around her, hands resting on her belly.

"I'm just picturing the look on Rodney's face when we tell him that we have a wedding to plan." He said, laughing with Elizabeth.

"Merry Christmas, Elizabeth." John whispered, kissing her head again.

"Merry Christmas, John." Elizabeth murmured back. She settled back against John and sighed again, perfectly content to sit and watch the fire quietly; wrapped in the arms of the man she loved.


End file.
